The 'Friend'ly Species

Friends! When I hear this word the first thought that comes to my mind is the sitcom 'Friends'. It really surprises me that when i think about friends, no one in particular comes to my mind. Rather some kind of classification of friends pops into my head. Yea...classification! If you never knew that friends could be classified, let me enlighten you on this one. After all these years of making so many friends, (please don't ask me how many are still friends with me...it will just show you how anti social I am) and nothing much to do right now, I sort of classified my friends. I know it sounds very judgemental but then we humans are like that.

And so the classification begins...

• The Social Groups Variety :- This kind of friends are friends because of the same social group we belong to. They are school friends, college friends, office friends, etc. They just interact with you when you are together at school, college, office, etc. The friendship is due to the same social group. If you leave the social group. the friends are gone too (am taking an example from most cases).

• The Use and Throw Variety :- Basically these are the kind of friends I have mostly encountered. The name explains it all. In times of need and help, they require you and the moment you help them and their problems are solved, they just disappear. They just come to you if they need a listening hear, helping hand or just sweet tongue to make them feel good. Once they feel good, the friendship is in dumps. That is they use you and throw you. So simple it seems!

• The Best friends today and Who-are-you-tomorrow Variety :- Quite a big name, but then I had no better name than this one. These are the kind of friends who all of a sudden announce that you are their best friend and can't stop talking about your friendship. Then with the same suddeness they act like they don't even know you. Duh! I always keep wondering what is wrong with these kind of friends. But I reached to a conclusion that they suffer from some split personality disorder. Poor them!

• The Kingfisher Variety :- 'The King of Good Times'. They are always there with you during your good times. Come bad times and they disappear. Friends in good times and nobody in your bad times. These kind of friends are frequently found. Wonder why are they even called friends!

• The Friends outside and Foes inside Variety :- This reminds me of the figure of speech 'Antithesis'. They are all so smiling and caring from their faces but deep down inside their hearts they are hatching a plot to assassinate you. Okay! Not assassinate you but to put you down. Whatever! They are enemies in the disguise of friends.

• The Jaan De denge Variety :- These are normally known as best friends. Not that they will give their lives but the ones to stick with you during your good and bad times equally. The only variety that truely belongs to the friends class. I really haven't encountered these type but i would surely wish to for a change from the other varieties. If you have these kind of friends, you sure are lucky.

P.S. : No offence meant to anyone. If you don't agree with my list, you are very lucky not to have encountered these kind of friends.

Here's Red Hot Chilli Peppers for all my friends. No matter what class they belong to, I love all of them :

My friends are so depressed
I feel the question
Of your loneliness
Confide... `cause Ill be on your side
You know I will, you know I will

X girlfriend called me up
Alone and desperate
On the prison phone
They want... to give her 7 years
For being sad

Chorus :
I love all of you
Hurt by the cold
So hard and lonely too
When you dont know yourself

My friends are so distressed
And standing on
The brink of emptiness
No words... I know of to express
This emptiness

Chorus :
Imagine me taught by tragedy
Release is peace
I heard a little girl
And what she said
Was something beautiful
To give... your love
No matter what